A Blessing for the Unknown Self

Below, a poem from John O'Donohue's Book of Blessings - Beannachtaí or Benedictus. I've been reading and re-reading it, and find it wonderful, especially the final four stanzas.

The Unknown Self

So much of what delights and troubles you
Happens on a surface
You take for ground,
Your mind thinks your life alone,
Your eyes consider air your nearest neighbour,
Yet it seems that a little below your heart
There houses in you an unknown self
Who prefers the patterns of the dark
And is not persuaded by the eye’s affection
Or caught by the flash of thought.

It is a self that enjoys contemplative patience
With all your unfolding expression,
Is never drawn to break into light
Though you entangle yourself in unworthiness
And misjudge what you do and who you are.

It presides within like an evening freedom
That will often see you enchanted by twilight
Without ever recognizing the falling night,

It resembles the under-earth of your visible life:
All you do, and say and think is fostered
Deep in its opaque and prevenient clay,

It dwells in a strange, yet rhythmic ease
That is not ruffled by disappointment,
It presides in a deeper current of time
Free from the force of cause and sequence
That otherwise shapes your life.

Were it to break forth into day,
Its dark light might quench your mind
For it knows how your primeval heart
Sisters every cell of your life
To all your known mind would avoid,

Thus it knows to dwell in you gently,
Offering you only discreet glimpses
Of how you construct your life.

At times it will lead you strangely,
Magnetized by some resonance
That ambushes your vigilance.

It works most resolutely at night
As the poet who draws your dreams,
Creating for you many secret doors,
Decorated with pictures of your hunger,

It has the dignity of the angelic
That knows you to your roots,
Always awaiting your deeper befriending
To take you beyond the threshold of want,
Where all your diverse strainings
Can come to wholesome ease.


[John O’Donohue, from Benedictus – A Book of Blessings, Bantam Press, 2007]

Spiritual Warrior

The Spiritual Warrior sits in the middle of the fire. --- Pema Chodron

Who are you?
I am one who carries the wisdom of years
I am one who faces into the fire
I am one who knows the cleansing of the fire
I am one who has gathered the many-coloured threads and ribbons of my spiritual life and history about my staff
I am one who trusts
I am one who faces what is coming straight-on
I am one who speaks my truth quietly and with dignity
I am one who is ready to raise my standard aloft
I am one who knows that there is much I do not understand but that I can still be a spiritual warrior in that place

What do you have to give me?
I give you courage, assurance, faith. I give you the fire of your own spirit. I give you the standard you can carry, woven about with all your history, all you know. I give you the path for which you are destined.

What do you want from me?
Courage, willingness to lift your standard, and your voice. Faith abiding. Willingness to be a channel. Trust. Readiness to go into the fire.

---------------------------------

Note: This card was made some time ago, and I didn't know quite what to name it, so I called it "Fire-Carrier", but knew the figure isn't carrying the fire, and yet the fire isn't just background. Anne Marie recently asked about our Spiritual Warriors, and shared her Spiritual Warrior card, and the above quote from Pema Chodrom. That resonated for me. I realised that this is the card that represents my Spiritual Warrior. I hadn't quite known how to relate to it, thrown off in part by the presence of a cross as part of the standard or staff he carries, but I've sat with it, and taken the comments of some of the Kaleidosoul participants in, and now realise that this is a wider, older and more all-encompassing symbol than a mere cross, and I am happy with this as a symbol of my spiritual life.

Reflections and comments are welcome!

Grief... the Journey

I have written a couple of posts on my main blog - GreenishLady - about the loss of my mother, who passed away on 9th July. Today, I posted a piece inspired by something I read of John O'Donohue's, in which he says:

"The soul is always wiser than the mind, even though we are dependent on the mind to read the soul for us."

This seems to me a very apt quote to illustrate what happens in SoulCollage®. The soul makes its presence felt in the selection of images and in the making of the cards; and then it makes itself felt when we draw cards in a reading.

If my mind had been asked which neters would support me in coming through the loss of Mam, I imagine I'd have gone for my Healer, Death, Prayer, Divine Mother (Council) cards; the community cards I've made for my mother, and my father and other family members; my heart chakra Lion card... Logic would dictate that these would all be meaningful and helpful in the grief journey.

With my sister, yesterday evening, I did a reading asking that question (Which neters will support me in coming through the loss of Mam?), and my wise soul selected four cards that my mind would have bypassed:

My Caring Gardener reminds me that: as I care for the earth, the earth cares for me, and keeps me in contact with the cycles of life.
..........
This is my Water-bearer card.
I am one who is nourished by the Waters of Life; who respects and cares for water. Water will remind me of my birth and connect me to Mam.
......
This is my Explorer Card.
I am one who takes comfort in nature; in exploring small spaces; in silence and in memories of childhood.

This is Kathryn.

I am one who values friendship. I am one who lives my own life. I am one who knows the importance of nurturing. I am one who will be there for you............

This combination of cards becomes a powerful support, with reminders of practical, tangible and spiritual forces on which I can call in this journey. So my mind just has the task of remembering and assisting me in bringing these neters into action in my life.

-------------------------

I joined in Roberta Rook's Kaleidosoul teleclass on Grief last night, and much of what was said was so in tune with this reading and with how I've been feeling that I feel all the more connected and supported within my own SoulCollage practice, and within the SoulCollage community. Thanks to all who took part, and especially thank you to Roberta and Anne Marie.

The Magical SoulCollage Slipper

Do you have a Magical SoulCollage Slipper? No? Maybe you do, and you don't even realise it! Here's mine:

Do you see the central image? The slipper? That's been part of my stash of images practically since I first started making SoulCollage cards in December 2003. That's 4 years and more, this little piece of paper has been in one or other of the folders in which I'd pile up images I'd clipped but not yet used. At each card-making session, I'd pull out these bundles of images, and one or other of them would frequently become the beginning-point of my next card.

That pink oriental slipper has been in my hand many times as I sought out the complementary images which would make up my next card, but until this weekend, each time it went back into the folder unused.

..

This weekend, as I sat with a group of 7 women in my sister's house, once more that image emerged, but this time, I put it with a bundle of other images out there for anyone to use. I'd decided that at this stage, most of those images weren't going to be of any particular meaning for me, so I let them go. My sister-in-law handled it. "Are you going to use that?" I asked. "No... it's pretty... but no... Maybe Zoe would like it?" It got passed to Zoe. "Mmm. It is pretty..." She put it aside. I told them how it had been a long time hanging around. How it had been in my hand at the start of gathering images for many of my cards, but had never found its way into a card.

We went on with the day. Around me, women gathered pages from magazines, moved scraps of colour about on cards, trimmed and pasted, mused about whether this or that image "fit" there. I was working on three cards, but my mind kept wandering back to that pink slipper. And suddenly, the meaning of that image for me became clear.

..
It was the catalyst for so many cards. It was the magic slipper that allowed me to find the images for my cards. Once I put it on, I moved into the SoulCollage space. Having found the images, I could put it aside until the next time... and the next time.

This slipper wasn't an image that didn't belong on one of my cards. It is behind many of them. This slipper is the way into my SoulCollage cards. It says:

I am one who leads you to magic

I am one who helps you find your way in to your cards

I am one who leads you to the next neter

I am one who skips away lightly when you have reached your goal

I am one whose meaning stays hidden until the time is right

I remind you to trust the process

I remind you that there is magic in the work

I remind you to tread lightly

...

What image in your stash keeps reappearing and acting as the catalyst for a card without ending up in the actual card? Is it an animal? A person? A tree?

What is your Magical SoulCollage Slipper?

Synchronicity: Facing Death

I had another of my little "SoulCollage Soirees" yesterday, when three friends joined me at home to do a reading and to make some cards. It was wonderful. There was healing, joy, trust, love there. I felt very blessed to be among such great women. I took photos of each person's crop of cards, but forgot to check if they'd be ok with my publishing them here, so I'll hold off on that for a few days, but there is something I want to share with you.

Today, I encountered a quote from Elizabeth Kubler-Ross's "The Wheel of Life",

"When we have done all the work we were sent to Earth to do, we are allowed to shed our body, which imprisons our soul like a cocoon encloses the future butterfly. And when the time is right, we can let go of it and we will be free of pain, free of fears and worries-free as a very beautiful butterfly, returning home to God..."

-from a letter to a child with cancer.

Above is the card I made yesterday, which I named "Death/Rebirth transformation". I already have two death cards in my deck, and yet, I felt there was another to be made - one that really incorporates a sense of the rebirth that is right there at the moment of death. I was not thinking of that quote (although I have read the book, quite a few years ago), so imagine my surprise when I did read it today. The other death cards I've made are the two sides of the idea of death - one the "light" side, emphasising death as a "messenger of joy". The other is what I call the "shadow-side", the dark, fearful part of death. Others who have seen this card, however, have not felt that darkness to be threatening or scary. They have found it comforting too.

Perhaps the skeletal / mummified part of the new card is too stark an image to offer comfort. I don't know. I just know that it felt "right" to put these two together, that this card seems to be a synthesis of the feelings of the other two cards.

I made three other cards yesterday, but will share them another time. I'd be interested to have feedback on these cards. - Does the new card look like it would be comforting or reassuring to someone who is actually facing death?

[22/4/08 -- This post has been edited from its first version]

Where are the Men?

I live in a world that is very female. My closest contacts are almost all with female friends, with my sisters. Most of the bloggers I connect with are female. In my writers group, we have only one male member. The SoulCollage community is almost totally female. (There are some male facilitators, but only a very few, relative to the number of women who are using SoulCollage in their lives). Yes, I have a son, a father, brothers, but still, sometime more than a year ago, I became aware of the absence of masculine creative energy in my SoulCollage. I realised I'd been gathering images of male artists - actors, musicians, writers, chefs - that I wanted to bring together to celebrate the men who inspire me, and their particular energy. Above is the card I made. I added the four older men in the bottom-left, not because they are artists (I don't know if they are!) but because of that companionship their pose portrays.

I was reminded to post this today by a post Lila made on her blog, Indigo Pears, in which she has done something similar in an altered book page.

I've felt a bit shy about this card. I do know that the energy I'm drawn to here is not attraction to the men per se, but it is to do with my own balance of animus/anima energies, and a will to bring the masculine more into play within myself.

More of Kathryn's cards

Kathryn came by to share the cards she made during the few days after the card-making session she and I had shared with my sister a couple of weeks ago. She doesn't have a scanner, nor does she blog, but she wanted her own sister to be able to see these, so I'm posting them here. I'm really glad to get to see them, and to share them with you, too, because I love each of these cards. The first is "The Wisdom of Patience" This second card is "Masculine Tenderness"

This next card is "Grace"

...and she entitles this final card "Entering your True Nature"